Thursday, April 12, 2012

Shelly

Okay, I know I haven't posted in a while, well like two months, but that's besides the point. The point is that I've found something funny I want to share with any viewers that ever come onto my blog. This was from a challenge on Brandon Sanderson's blog, which was to write a short story using only dialogue.
So here it is! Enjoy!

“Have you ever considered that someone might not want to get naked with you?”
“No I can’t say I have. How can any woman resist this total sexiness?”
“Well, I am
definitely not attracted.”
“What? How is that even possible? I think you’re lying.”
“I don’t like you, Jake. And why couldn’t you have put a shirt on?”
“I am completely gorgeous.”
“So? You’re also a complete jack wagon.”
“What was that? You do want to get into bed with me? OW! What was that for?”
“You
so had it coming, creeper. It’s taking all my willpower not to tear you to shreads.”
“Oh, I see. You’re madly in love with me. That makes sense. Way more sense than you not feeling any attracting to my amazing physique.”
“No.”
“No what? You just said you wanted to tear me to shreads.”
“Yes, I did. That means I want to kill you, genius. And quit touching my arm like that!”
“Like what? OW!”
“Even someone as blatantly stupid as you should have seen that one coming.”
“I didn’t deserve that!”
“Yes, you did. And you deserve a bit -actually a lot- more than that, but I am going to be generous and give you ten seconds to get out of my apartment.”
“Or what?”
“I’ll go get my shotgun.”
“You keep a shotgun in here? Who does that?”
“I do. To keep creepers like you out. Now get.”
“But-”
“10... 9...”
“Okay, okay! I’m gettin’!”
“8... 7... 6...”
“Geez, some women! I’m out!”
“Good! Stay out!”
“So is that a no to sleeping with you?”
“You bet your pretty little behind it is! And if you set foot in here again, I will blow you to smithereens! And then I will call the cops.”
“Wow, Jake. You’ve got girl problems. Big time.”
“Not now, George. Can’t you see I’m in the middle of seducing a totally hot, sexy woman?”
“Not having much luck by the looks of it.”
“Go away already, George!”
“She’s already onto the shotgun and police threats? How long have you been at this?”
“That’s none of your business! Now go away!”
“You’re the one who should be hightailing it! I’ve got my shotgun and I am not afraid to use it!”
“Oh come on Shelly! Don’t be so mean! You know you want me and my total sexiness! I’m not leaving until you admit it!”
“I am calling the police!”
Sure you are. That’s what they all say before they open up their doors to me.”
“I can’t hear you! And frankly, I don’t really think I want to.  Yes officer, there’s a man outside my door who is sexually harassing me...”
“Oh crap. She really did call the police!”
“Mhm, he’s about five nine , skinny, green eyes, brown hair, wearing blue jeans, no shoes and no shirt with a necklace that has a star on it.”
“Oh crap! I’m getting out of here!”
“...is he gone? Ha! The shotgun and police trick always works! He’d better not come back, or I’ll call the police for real. Oh hey George.”
“Hi Shelly. Looking beautiful as always.”
“Thanks. What are you doing out here?”
“Enjoying the show.”

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Prompts #16-23

Let's pretend again that I'm not the crappiest blogger on the face of the earth, and that this is Sunday, not Monday.
YAY! New Prompts!

16.  It was just one of those days.
17. This is EXACTLY what it looks like
18. She looked at him with pleading eyes. “Please, only this time...” she begged.
19. "No, I can't explain, you're just going to have to come with us. Sorry. Protocol."
20. "We lost one."
21. And this time, she did scream.
22. She shivered, and searched for the blankets on the bed to pull over her
23. "I didn't do it on purpose, despite how the angels saw it."

The Door (Part 4)

Yay! Next shortie chapter!
I finally had to resort to Write Or Die to actually get anything out, but now it seems to be getting a little more exciting.
Oh, and Happy Single Awareness day!
And sorry I haven't posted in like a week. I'm just really bad at blogging I suppose.
Part One
Part Two
Part Three

(Edit: I forgot the first two paragraphs yesterday)


Kelana stared in a way that seemed to ask, "Are you stupid?".
     Nezinth didn't notice the expression, for he had cocked his head to the right, as if listening for something. Kelana frowned, listening as well. She heard nothing but silence however.
     Suddenly Nezinth leaped at her, quick enough that she had no time to react. He tackled her to the floor just as there was a great explosion of dust and rock.

     Kelana felt a blush rising to her face as the the boy covered her body with his own, shielding her from flying projectiles of lethal stones. There was a rumbling, and then another explosion.
     After that there was silence.
     Nezinth slowly got off of Kelana, rolling to the side and then sitting back up to see if she was okay. She was doing fine, aside from the blush that had risen to her face at the shock of having him that close to her. She laid on the floor, breathing heavy.
     After nodding to himself at Kelana's unharmed condition, Nezinth stood and faced the direction of the blast. There was a moment of silence, and by then Kelana's shock was wearing off, and her curiosity was acting up. She shuddered once at the thought of Nezinth on her, even though he had been protecting her, then she sat up to see what was happening.
     And somehow managed to stay conscious, though she grew light headed.
     Sticking it's head through a giant hole in the wall, was a big, green dragon. Kelana's mouth dropped open wide.
     A dragon! She thought to herself. I'm seeing a real dragon! Nezinth had said that he was a dragon, but she hadn't seen a lick of evidence for that.
     The giant green dragon's giant pink eye focused on her, though she couldn't quite tell because Nezinth was standing in front of her.
     YOU THOUGHT WE WOULD NOT KNOW? A voice suddenly pounded in her head. She cried out in pain, and dropped her head into her hands .
     She felt a hand on her shoulder, and she felt the pain easing away . She looked up to see Nezinth had drawn closer to her and put his hand on her shoulder.
     Leave, dragon brother, She heard Nezinth's voice in her head. This is the Mother Dragon's Temple. Do not dishonor her, He sounded like he was threatening the dragon. It seemed so funny, that a small boy should challenge a giant dragon, that she almost laughed. Almost.
     He sounded confident too, which made her wonder.
     SHE MUST BE DESTROYED, The voice said in her head again, but not so painfuly.
     Destroyed? Me? She thought to herself Why? Her head was only beginning to clear of confusion, but the dragon was adding to it.
     She is the mother dragon! She heard Nezinth arguing with the dragon. He didn't sound so confident in that statement, but he said it anyway.
     THE MOTHER DRAGON? NO. SHE IS NOT, YOU FOOL, The dragon roared.
     Well, at least no everybody thinks I'm the Mother Dragon, She thought to herself.
     She is the Mother Dragon! Nezinth thought loud and clear again.
     OH REALLY? AND JUST WHAT DOES SHE HAVE TO SAY TO THAT?
     Nezinth looked at Kelana. She shook her head. "I am not the Mother Dragon." In fact, she still couldn't believe all of this was happening. Dragons? No, they couldn't be real. She decided that she simply must be delusional.
     SHE MUST BE DESTROYED The green dragon roared again, and growled.
     Then he shape shifted.
     He turned into a human. Just like Nezinth. Just like a normal mid-thirties man. This was a dragon?
     Kelana sat with her mouth agape once more. She couldn't comprehend how all of this was happening.
     "Now, how would you two like to die?" The man asked, his voice still deep and large as that of the green dragon.



Wednesday, February 8, 2012

The Door (Part 3)

There are two things I've learned in the last three days: 1) I'm really bad at updating and 2) I am slow at writing when I am uninspired (okay, who isn't?)
So here's part 3 of the door... it's really short this time around, my apologies...
For those of you who haven't read the beginnings, here they are:
Part One
Part Two


     When Kelana came to her head was being cradled in someone's lap. She opened her eyes to see the young man's concerned face filling her vision. She was a little addle brained from the fall, and she could feel the little bump on the back of her head from falling and hitting the floor. The marble floor.
     So she wasn't thinking clearly as she laid there with her head in his lap, she staring up at his face (albiet through blurred vision). She examined his face while she was lying there.
     He had shaggy silver-black hair that hung slightly into his eyes, and he was obviously not very good at keeping himself clean, for there were smudges of dirt on his face. He smelled like something sweet though, which she thought made no sense in correlation to the apparent state of his clothing and body. His eyes were a brilliant amber color, which she had never seen before on a person. Under the layers of dirt, however, there was a strong chinline and a straight nose.
     Suddenly, her senses that had deserted her came back and she hurriedly got to her feet, jumping out of his lap. She backed a few steps away from the silent young man with gorgeous eyes. "Who are you?" She asked warily.
     I am Nezinth Halsdor, Mother Dragon She nearly fainted again when she heard his voice in her head again. He had pulled himself to his feet and he was staring unblinkingly at her.
     "I am not a mother of anything," She said to Nezinth, pointing a warning finger at him. "And certainly not dragons."
     A look of confusion passed over his face, and he looked over at the statue of the woman that looked nearly exactly like Kelana. He looked back at her. What do you mean? His voice sounded in her head.
     "I am not a mother. I'm only seventeen for Skad's sake!" She said shakily. "And quit talking to me in my head!" To say it like that seemed quite strange to Kelana, but what else could be talking in her head besides him?
     am insane, she thought to herself as she watched the conflicting emotions go across Nezinth's face. This is probably all just some delusional dream or something.
     "You look like the Mother Dragon," Nezinth said, slowly, as if it was a challenge, and a funny accent. His mouth seemed unfamiliar with the words.
     "I don't even know who the Mother Dragon is," Kelana growled at the boy. He still wore an expression of bewilderment. "Dragon's aren't even real."
     This brought an amused smile to Nezinth's face. She scowled at him. "What?"
     "That which you cannot be true, because I am a dragon myself."



Sunday, February 5, 2012

Prompts #8-15

Wahoo! Time for new prompts! (Although that was kinda yesterday that I should have done this but I'm going to pretend I'm posting this at the right time)

8. "The boy must be killed. Who knows what he will do if he lives?"
9. And when I looked over, he was smiling.
10. He grasped for it, feeling it barely brush against the tips of his fingers, and then it was gone.
11. Alisha didn't even have to open his eyes to know they were here.
12. “There is no use running. There is nowhere to go.”
13.  It was not the birthday gift I was expecting.
14.  I was not expecting what was waiting for me just as I rounded the corner.
15. It was one of those days when everything seemed to go wrong.

So yeah, there's your belated prompts for you!



Saturday, February 4, 2012

The Door (Part 2)

So this one's a bit shorter than the last one by a few hundred words, but here it is.
You might want to read part one if you haven't.

She gaped at the back of his head, he still unaware that she was there. Her eye twitched.
     The young man let go of the handle and walked into the doorway, which seemed to be a pool of grey, like the door just went into the wall. But when he stepped into it, it rippled and enveloped him, and he disappeared into the grey.
     Kelana stared dumbly at the grey pool of nothing. How did he do that? She shook her head, then resolutely walked forward towards the open door. She was just a foot away from the grey when she stopped walking. She leaned forward trying to see through it. She saw only grey, of course. 
     Straightening, Kelana held out a hand. She hesitated to touch it, but then she put her hand onto the wall of grey, sending ripples across it. It was cold, and she tried pulling her hand away. She frowned as her hand wouldn't come off, like it was stuck.
     And then the grey started pulling her hand in. She cursed and tried pulling her hand free. She accidentally tried to brace herself with her other hand on the cold pool of grey, and she was pulled into the grey by both hands. She swore right before she was engulfed by the cold pool of grey.
     Her vision was filled with the grey, and she felt suffocated, though it seemed she could breath. She couldn't move though.
     The next moment, she emerged on what she guessed was the other side. She gawked at what she saw. 
     Pure white marble pillars raised the roof that curved into a dome. On the inside of the dome was painted with intricately detailed flying dragons through the sky with fluffy clouds. 
     Under the dome, however, was a sight even more beautiful and shocking. There was a dragon statue with a woman statue on a raised platform with stairs leading up to it. The dragon was about eight feet taller than the woman, with sky blue scales and feathery scales along the spine. The tail of the dragon swooped out around the front of the woman. The dragon's head was tilted off to the side, as if it was looking at Kelana out the side of it's eye. The woman was in front of the dragon, and she had a spring dress on that was colored sky blue, her hair was braided and over her shoulder so that it hung down the front, and it had delicate spring flowers in it. Her arms were spread in a welcoming gesture, and her face was carved into a soft expression of love.
     What was shocking about it was that the woman looked like Kelana, just a little more matured. They could have been twins.
     She remembered the reason she had come in here as the young man whipped around to face her, drawing her attention to him. She saw a mixture of shock, suspicion, then some more shock pass on his face before he dropped to one knee, bowing his head. 
     She assumed that he knelt because she was a princess, but something told her otherwise. Literally.
     Selvara, a young man's voice sounded softly in her head. It is an honor.
     Kelana promptly fainted.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Art Final





     Alright, so the real reason I haven't posted anything in the last two or three day is because it's finals week, so I've been up late doing homework and the like. However, I just got done with my Art Final and I'd thought I'd post it because I haven't posted a lot.
     And as a first time blogger, I was looking around on the internet and a lot of the 30 day challenges for bloggers included pictures. So I thought, hey why not a picture of my art?
     I didn't really like this project for mainly two reasons: I don't like Andy Warhol, and I don't like Pop Art. But hey, it's school, so what can you do? Tell the teacher you don't want to?
     So I did it, and I am pleased with the results. I figured out I actually kind of like collaging things, and that I have a new view on Andy. I still don't like his art work that much, but I feel like I know him as an artist better. If I had to use one word to describe Andy, I would say 'childish' as in he viewed the world as a child would. He didn't seem like he got the concept of dying, and he felt like everybody should love everybody (his quote of this is in the top picture).
     I also feel that I can connect more with Andy than anyone else in my class because he had aspergers, which I have as well. Aspergers is a mild form of autism. People with aspergers usually are socially awkward, take things very literally, and are very naive about the workings of the world. Many people exhibit symptoms of aspergers, but it takes a lot of symptoms to be diagnosed with aspergers.
     The next word I would use to describe Andy is 'lost'. It was like he didn't know where his place was in the world, and he was almost trying to find a reason for life.
     So yeah, there's my cheery, gooey reflection on my art work. Tell me what you think! And wish me luck on my next four finals!